The Everlasting
by Koi no Mega Lover
Summary: Angela wanted to live happily ever after. She didn't want much and she certainly didn't expect much. But when she takes a once in a lifetime opportunity, she finds herself in Italy. And undead. Angela-centric, Post-BD.
1. Preface

**Preface**

I had always assumed that I'd live a very, very normal life; average, routine, interesting at best.

It was how I'd spent the entirety of my life leading up to these series of events. Talk with my mother, be protected by my father, play with my brothers, hang out my friends and be loved by my boyfriend.

School was easy, as was life beforehand. No really stressful troubles other than meeting new people, taking tests and having enough courage to not get embarrassed very time I would have to talk in front of people I didn't know, a weakness of mine.

So I'd never really even given thought to what would happen if my life took a sharp turn; if I crashed and burned along with the rest of my boring existence, like a dreadful car crash. Although at this moment, a car crash seems quite inviting, if not to sound too suicidal. But anyone who has lived this entirely new, and painful existence that has been thrust upon me; you'd want to die eventually too.

The _thing_ I loved smiled a feral one as he stroked my cold, dead cheek.


	2. My Nostalgia

**My Nostalgia **

_Aro Volturi tossed the light file aside. "Jane. What could I possibly want with this mere human?" he asked in his usually casual manner. _

_Jane grinned, showing her physical age of just an early-teen for a split second. "She has displayed some unusual traits, Aro." She explained. "I'm positive that this human girl is the perfect candidate to test your theory on." _

_Aro's deep burgundy eyes seemed to light up in a sort of glee. "Are you sure, Jane? Positive?" _

_Jane nodded. "100% percent." _

_Aro's eyes gazed down into the ever still eyes of the teenage girl in the picture. _

"_Then get her; bring me my newest pet… Angela." _

*

"How about this one? Do you think the fabric is too cliché? I mean, I don't want to be like, _usual_ or something." The voice of my best friend rung out, almost disgusted at being an 'already seen it' bride.

"Hey, Ange! Hello? Angela!" My best friend, Jessica Stanley stalked out of the change room sporting her newest wedding gown. "Have you even been listening to me, Angela?"

"Hm?" I murmured after Jessica had to revert to yelling. "What's wrong? You look great." I said with a false smile.

Jess's angry expression faded, a happy one replacing it. "It does look fantastic, doesn't it? I think it's a Maggie Sottero…pretty classy."

I just smiled and nodded.

"The design fits perfectly on your thin and petite frame, miss." A woman appeared next to my seat; she had long blonde hair with startling green eyes. Her name tag read 'Michaela'.

Jessica blushed at the compliment. "Thank you. I've been on a diet for the past few months and I really think its working." She told the assistant, not at all modest. It was times like these I missed Bella.

Michaela nodded with a large smile. "Definitely, although I cant see you any way that you are now. This is definitely a promising gown on you, miss…?"

"Jessica Stanley."

"Well, Jessica. This dress is very, very flattering on you. But there could be another, more perfect one; would you like to get one for you?" Michaela's voice asked, clearly sucking up.

Jessica nodded enthusiastically. "Yes, yes." She said happily.

Jessica grinned at me. "She's a professional, so she'll help me get the perfect dress to my perfect wedding!" She exclaimed and clasped her hands together in front of her chest, looking quite the glowing bride.

So Jessica proceeded to trying out the next dress, along with the next dozen. I couldn't really tell them apart, although one stood out for me; a gorgeous vintage piece with long sleeves and an early 1900's theme; 1930's or 40's.

Jessica grinned at her reflection as I had a small flashback of the last time I'd seen Bella, at her wedding almost three years ago. I smiled nostalgically; this dress looked startlingly similar to Edward's family heirloom, if my memory serves correct.

I repressed the urge to comment that this dress had already been done, something Jessica had been determined to avoid with her dress.

"I _love_ this one!" Jessica said, almost bouncing.

Michaela smiled in satisfaction; no doubt it was very expensive. It looked designer. "Definitely on the maybe pile; vintage is so in."

Jessica looked at her reflection once more. "Hmmm, yeah. Vintage _is_ in this year…"

We left the store after that, leaving a steaming Michaela behind. I think she expected us to buy something. We looked at some bride's maid dresses, since I was her maid of honor, before beginning the drive back to our apartments.

I knew that I shouldn't have worried, but Jess didn't seem to be the same on the way home. She was so happy looking at her in the expensive imitation of Bella's stunning dress, what had changed?

I dropped off Jessica at her apartment she shared with her high school sweetheart and fiancé Mike Newton, and continued to my own apartment that I shared with my special someone: Benjamin 'Ben' Cheney.

Since Ben and I were still at college – our final year, for the both of us – were had acquired an apartment not too far from the university we attended.

I parked the car in the underground garage and made my way up the stairs and to my 5th floor apartment and smiled happily as my own high school sweetheart embraced me.

"Hey, honey." He greeted as I bent my head a fraction to kiss him. He was still a few inches shorter than me. "How was the torture?" Ben asked cheekily.

I playfully smacked him on the arm as I made my way into our bedroom. I'd decorated it a few months after we'd moved in, so now it felt like home to me.

"Torturous." I laughed as I kicked off my heels and dropped my bag. "The last dress she tried on was one that looked like Bella's." I told him.

Instantly, Ben made a face. "Care to remind me? Guy, remember? Plus it was three years ago, and no ones even knows where they are now."

I smiled at him lovingly, with a hint of sadness. I missed Bella. "It was Old-fashioned." I said as Ben nodded, although he seemed to only do it because he knew that he couldn't remember it for the life of him. "Anyway, she seemed kind of weird driving home."

Ben smirked. "Perhaps she has cold feet?" He laughed to himself while a smirked and shook my head.

"Although possible, she _was_ the one to pressure him to propose in the first place." I noted and walked with him out to the kitchen, spaghetti bolognaise sitting hot on the counter, waiting for me.

We'd created the perfect balance. Ben would cook, and I'd clean, since the both of us were hopeless at the other.

Ben chuckled. "Poor guy; I knew I should have warned him when she'd dropped hints. It's going to be kids next." He commented and walked back over to the dining table where his newest assignment lay.

I looked down at my food which I was quickly shoveling down. Ben and I made the perfect couple, well; at least that's what I'd been told. We never fought, we worked perfectly and conversation was never awkward between us. He was easy to be around and I liked him since I was a junior at Forks High. And from what Ben had confessed to me on one of our more sensitive days, I was gorgeous and loving, and his crush from the 8th grade.

Compared to Jessica and Mike – the infamous 'off-and-on' couple of Forks High – Ben and I were close to perfect. The only couple I could see being even more compatible than us would have to be Bella and Edward.

But anyone who'd met the couple – wait, let me rephrase. Anyone who _didn't_ have a blinding infatuation with Edward _or_ Bella could see that they were made for each other. Whereas people commented on how cute and happy Ben and I were, did we pale in comparison to the not-so-newlywed Mr. and Mrs. Cullen?

And to be completely honest, throughout Jessica and Mike's agonizing fiancé stage – that, might I add, hasn't even finished. Their wedding date is still four months away on October 13th, God save us all – I've been thinking about what it would be like to marry Ben.

I envisioned it to be much like it was now; efficient, loving, and playful. Although we weren't at college, we'd live in a house…back at Forks, maybe, or Port Angeles. And we'd have children, a girl and a boy.

I flushed red. What was I thinking? Ben and I were still so young, and I'm positive that he wasn't interested in marriage just yet. But one day, he'd be a great husband and father. But I was happy with what I'd had now.

Picking up my delicious Italian meal – my favorite type of food – made by my fantastic boyfriend of 5 years, I walked into the living room and sat next to the current light of my life; Ben Cheney.

*

I love my major, I _really_ do. I swear it's just like doing nothing all day, like hanging out with friends and documenting memories. Photography was always my passion, even at Forks.

Even now, it was so relaxing. I was sitting in my photography classroom along with the other 40 or so people. It was the end of semester, and we were supposed to collect a portfolio of our work and present them as our end of semester assessment. It was a piece of cake.

I smiled as I found a particularly good picture I'd taken of a couple walking through the Forks Forest when we'd gone out as a class to take forest pictures. The people were a couple in my class, Daniela and Shawn. From what I know, they're about on the same relationship level as Ben and I.

Clicking through my vast collection of photographs on my laptop, I arrived to the ones that would probably mean the most to me: High school.

Now I realize that I'm being incredibly cliché here, but high school really _was _my golden years. It was there that I'd overcome my crippling shyness and discovered my passion of photography. Not to mention that I met Ben there. I'd also been the year-book photographer, so it'd been my duty to take so many pictures.

There were photos of every classroom, of the fields and gym. As well as the cafeteria, so many well-loved memories in that place.

I flicked through pictures of Jessica and Mike being disgustingly gooey, to only be instantly replaced with ones where Jessica is glaring at him from the corner of her eye.

In my collection I dug up heaps of pictures of La Push and First Beach that I'd forgotten that I'd even taken.

I also found pictures of Eric, Tyler, Connor and Lauren; to my upmost dissatisfaction, she was smirking into the camera.

But the other pictures – my most treasured ones, by far – were of Ben, Bella and Edward, and even his sister Alice. I guess that I'd just created this strange bond with the youngest Cullen siblings in our senior year. Plus, and not to sound vain or anything, but they look _so good_ on camera! I swear it's like taking pictures of a couple of models. And I must say it feels so professional. Not to mention that taking pictures of Bella and Edward must be one of the most romantic things to be seen.

I smiled softly as I closed off the page. It had been so long since I'd seen Bella; it was like she had just dropped off the map. Switching off the laptop, I turned my attention to a young girl who just entered the classroom.

She looked like she couldn't be any older than 16, at the most. She had very short dark hair along with extremely pale skin. She reminded me of the Cullen's, most definitely. The same deathly white skin and purplish bruises under her eyes, although I couldn't tell if her eyes were the same topaz coloured ones as Edward and Alice, hers seemed very dark, practically black.

She stood herself like Alice; graceful, slender, petite, gorgeous. She stepped into the room and made her way angelically over to my professor, smiling at us. I'm not sure why this action intimidated me so much. She was so young, what was there to be afraid of?

Professor Hastings called to us. "Students!" He yelled once, he was one of the unusual teachers: strict but fun, although he tended to yell most of the things he said. "Miss Jane Stewart has a wonderful announcement to make!" He said and smiled down at her tiny form.

"Thank-you, Christopher." She said, her voice high and melodic yet still childlike. "I am here to offer one of you the chance of a lifetime. See, I work for Volterra Incorporated: a large company situated in Volterra, Italy. In Volterra Inc., we range from hotels to beaches to casinos. Anything that serve our customers, and to serve our customers we have opened our very first mansion hotel in Volterra called Volturi, and we need someone to take photographs for advertising." She said with a smirk.

Whispers rang out through the room in shock. I could understand why, we weren't even out of college yet; not to mention only being from a Seattle college, wouldn't they be more happy with a London School for the Arts instead? This seemed all too strange, not to mention that her speech seemed all too prepared and mechanical.

Jane grinned. "We have decided to take a chance with one of you students and take you to Volterra to study and become an Italian photographer, worth of capturing _anyone_!" She announced as cheers occupied the classroom, every single heart in this room must have been bursting. And even though I did just have my suspicions, no one can turn down that offer. No one.

Jane coughed once to bring everyone back to her. "The lucky person who gets to live in Italy is the person who has shown the most passionate work of photography." She said and paused, watching everyone lean forward in excitement and suspense.

"Angela Weber."


	3. My Regrets

**My Regrets**

"_Please, enlighten me, Jane. Why is this human so important?" Felix's rough voice asked the petite vampire through the darkness of the black car they were travelling in. _

"_That is of none of your concern, Felix." Jane growled out, her dangerous teeth bearing. Felix flinched and stepped back, her teeth not intimidating him as much as her fearsome talent to occupy the mind with heart-stopping pain. _

_Jane smirked. "Well, if you must know. This human girl is very, very guarded." She said simply. _

_Felix growled. "And that's it? It's __**guarded**__? You bring me out here because one worthless human chick can't trust anyone?" He asked strangled rage pure on his face. Jane chuckled. "Yes, Felix. I have a large assumption that she might be a much better shield for Master Aro than __**Renata**__." She said, speaking the name with disgust and hatred. _

_Felix sneered. "Still all bend outta shape about her just because she gets to stay so close to 'Master Aro?'" He teased relentlessly. Jane glared at him as he stopped and began to moan in pain. "Jane!" He gasped out. "Stop it!" He said and breathed out once she stopped the relentless attack on his mind. _

"_Fine, as long as you will stop disrespecting Master Aro." She said coldly. "And I want this girl because she could be the next Bella. __**Our**__ Bella; only so much stronger."_

*

I didn't speak for a few seconds, still absorbing the words Jane had spoken. Me? _Me: _timid, shy, ordinary Angela Weber in _Italy_? How could I have been chosen? Other people in my class were ten times better than me! Nathaniel Banes had worked his whole life to get here; Yvonne George had literally busted her leg while working to get the money to go here. Why me? What did _I_ do? It couldn't have been my name she said. I must have heard wrong.

Jane looked at me pointedly. "Angela." She said with a slight tone of impatience. "Were you paying attention? I said you're going to Volterra."

Oh God, it was me. "Uh, y-yeah. I heard you." I muttered softly, looking down at my lap.

Jane raised one perfectly plucked eyebrow. "Come down here then."

I nodded quickly and made my way down through the aisles to the front of the room and stood in front of Jane. She smirked once more before handing me an envelope.

"Congrats, Angela." She whispered to me, although it sounded like a snake hissing. "You are a very, very lucky girl." She said and smirked once more and danced out the door not before nodding to Professor Hastings.

Professor Hastings gave me a slight pat on the back. "Very well done, Angela. You earned it." He said proudly as a few of my fellow students ran up and congratulated me. I didn't blame the ones who proceeded to ignore me for the rest of the lesson, I could understand if they were angry at me.

Once everyone had dispersed and I'd sat down at my table once more, I proceeded to open the letter Jane had so quickly stuffed into my hands.

With quick clumsiness, I'd finally opened the letter and peered inside. There, sitting for the whole world to see, was one first class plane ticket to Volterra, Italy.

With shaking hands, I reluctantly opened up the letter accompanying the expensive ticket.

_Dear Miss Angela Weber, _

_We are very happy to award you the very first Volterra Annual Photographer Scholarship to our very best university here in Italy. _

_Your abilities exceed any others in your year level, and we at Volturi Incorporated have much faith in your amazing abilities._

_Angela, you are our very first sponsored student. Please hold yourself with pride and grace as you are now the face of Volturi. _

_We know you are perfect for the opportunity. _

Antonio Dequeras

_Mr. Antonio Dequeras_

_Vice President Volturi Inc. _

*

I watched painfully as Ben read through the letter, probably for the 3rd time judging on the size of the text and the time he'd taken so far.

And I grew more and more paranoid as his facial expression hadn't changed either.

A few minutes had passed and he still hadn't made any reaction. "Ben?" I asked hesitantly.

Is if coming out of a trance, Ben looked at me with a smile. "Oh, Ange." He exclaimed as he embraced me. "I am so happy for you; this is what you've always wanted right?"

I went to say something, but was cut off once more. "And look! _Italy_! And you're leaving tomorrow…that's _great_." He said, slightly strained.

I rubbed my forehead slightly and sighed. "Look, Ben." I began as he looked me in the eye for the first time since reading the letter. "I…I'm thinking of turning it down." I confessed.

Ben's eyes widened in shock. "_What?_ Angela, you can't! This is huge; you can't turn down an opportunity this big. It's too important for you!" He shouted and grabbed my shoulders.

I smiled sadly at him. "I know, but I've set up my roots here. Going to Italy would be too big a change for me, plus, what would happen if I didn't make it in Italy? For one, I'd be stuck there with no means of getting home." I tried to explain calmly without letting the fear seep into my voice. Ben was never like this.

Ben sighed and shook his head. "You need to stop thinking over all the possibilities. You are an excellent photographer, Angela! Get that around your head!" He yelled.

I swallowed thickly. "But that's _me_, Ben! If I don't, I feel insecure. The world is dangerous, and so is Italy. I'm not going." I yelled in retaliation.

Ben muttered angrily to himself. "God, Ange. This is your big break, how can you just sit there and do nothing?!" he yelled and picked up his car keys before storming out of the apartment.

Tears leaked out of my eyes as I managed to stagger into the bedroom and pull out a large suitcase before beginning to recklessly throw random items of clothing into my bag.

I'm doing this for him, I told myself, as the tears continued to stream down my face.

An hour later, I lay on the double bed hiccupping with small tears still falling from my eyes, waiting to hear the sound of the front doors lock clicking open.

I didn't end up being able to keep my eyes open that long.

*

Ben had either gone back home in the middle of the night and left early in the morning, or he didn't go home at all. That was all I could think of as I sat miserable in my seat on the high class plane.

First class really was what all the movies made it out to be: leg room, champagne, no crying babies in front, no old men hitting on me to the side, and no little boy behind me kicking the seat.

I know I really should be enjoying it, but my mind didn't let me have the chance.

The whole ride, I was wishing it were over. I was praying to be able to get off soon, as there is very little to do on a plane for 12+ hours. Even in first class.

Once I had finally gotten off, I was greeted by the one and only Jane, who was accompanied by a hulking male figure who was standing beside her.

Smiling, Jane offered her hand to me in a show of politeness, I'm sure. "It's wonderful to see you again, Miss Weber. This is Felix, my acquaintance." She introduced.

I smiled softly and held out my hand to Felix, who accepted. Rock hard and cold, exactly like Jane's, I observed. The difference being that Felix's large, meaty hand easily dwarfed my own petite one. I wouldn't like to meet him in an alleyway.

After Jane, Felix and I all gathering into a long limousine – which I had to stop in awe at in an attempt to be professional – and settled down. I would have thought that we'd be talking about my duties for Volturi Inc., but apparently not.

"So, Jane." I began conversationally. "Do you know what I will be doing first?"

I almost didn't catch it, but I saw for a second that a very frightening look passed over the young girl's features for a second before turning towards me; little Jane's teeth were long and sharp.

Smiled innocently like noting had just happened, Jane answered. "Oh, you'll just be settling down from your experience."

Flustered, I simply assumed that she was talking about my very long plane ride.

How wrong I was.

Calm and professional, I was taken into a very old looking building in the heart of Volterra, Italy. Expecting to be taken to the very top floor, I was very put off guard when they lead me underground.

Quietly, I cleared my throat. "Um, Jane? Where are we going?"

Jane turned around and looked up at me. "To see the president." She said with practiced ease, yet it still threw me off. Why would they see the president of the multi-million dollar company in the basement?

Swallowing my many questions, I continued to follow Jane and Felix down the long staircase.

Finally reaching the end, I looked around and felt that it was acceptable to become scared. There were multiple figures standing around, all with long black body hiding coats on, all surrounding a large chair.

Seated on top on the chair was an extremely pale man whose skin was transparent like. He had long black hair tied up at the base of his neck with what I thought was bright red eyes. Even more frightening though, was his pearly white, long and sharp teeth that were smiling almost pleasantly at me.

I stepped back quickly and ended up hitting Felix's granite chest. Chuckling, the giant wrapped his arms around me in a vice. "You ain't going anywhere, human." He grounded out.

Crying out, I flailed around pointlessly. "What are you doing?! This isn't right! What's happening?!" I yelled.

Panic began to set in. I was supposed to be a simple photographer…why had they taken me to the basement, filled with strange cloaked figures and kept me here against my will?

The man on the chair in the middle on the room chuckled deeply, then, with a rich enticing voice ordered the giant holding me tightly. "Bring her here, Felix."

Obeying instantly, the hulking Felix walked forward slowly and handed my shaking figure over to the man on the chair.

Holding me in a grip with the same force as Felix, the man smiled wider, revealing even more teeth. "So beautiful…" He whispered. "You did do a wonderful job at picking her out, Jane." He said his now confirmed red eyes still on me possessively.

Slightly miffed, Jane nodded. "Thank you, Master." She said. Jane wasn't too happy at the close proximity between her master and me, from what my hazy mind could comprehend.

The man chuckled. "You are a knowledgeable one, aren't you?" He reached out and fingered a ringlet of her light brown hair. "Your heart is beating a mile a minute, yet you can still analyze a situation with a clear head. A _very_ good choice, Jane."

What was he talking about? Did I say that last part out loud? What was happening here?

Smiling good naturedly, the man began to introduce himself pleasantly. "Angela." He greeted. "My name is Aro Volturi, and I am a vampire. You are very vital to my plan, so I am excited to give you the gift of becoming a vampire as well." He said as my eyes grew larger and my flailing returned with a violent force. My thrashings didn't seem to be doing anything.

A vampire. Vampire…a bloodsucking vampire…

Was that while I was here? Was I going to die? Was I their victim? I was never going to see Ben again…

Unnoticing of my antics, Aro held my head firmly in his hands and moved down to my exposed neck. "Stay still, my dear. I wouldn't like it to hurt more than it has to be." He warned as his teeth ripped effortlessly through my pale flesh and into the pulsing vein in my neck.

My scream of terror ripped through Volterra.


	4. My Oblivion

**My Oblivion **

_"You are implementing the plan very quickly, Aro." Caius's brash voice muttered. "Don't you think you should wait?" _

_Aro smiled pleasantly as he lightly touched the weathering, 100-year-old photograph in his translucent hand. "No." He answered simply. "Never…forever." He muttered and watched as the brown and white photo of the young woman disintegrated into dust before his blood red eyes. "She's not going again. Never." _

*

Fire wasn't pleasant. Of course it wasn't; fire was used to represent the devil, Satan, hell. I was a good girl, I know I was. My father was the Forks resident minister, he'd preach on Sundays and I'd be there, sitting in the front row in my reserved seat. I had no sins, I was sure of it. I never stole, I loved my family and friends, I very rarely swore. Ben and I were still virgins, for Christ sakes!

So why was I being tortured with such a pain that cut me to my soul.

The fire was everywhere. In comparison, it felt like every single layer of my skin being peeled off by a sharp, un-relinquishing knife, intent on supplying me with every ounce of pain I would feel in my life time. It felt like I couldn't take it; but I knew it wouldn't stop. I would pass out soon, and after that, death surely awaited me. Fire was one and the same with hell; and apparently that's where I was going.

I recalled my last few moments before I entered this attack on my being. It didn't say anywhere in the bible that a _vampire_ came to drag you to the underworld, so I was obviously put off guard enough that I panicked as I felt the vampire teeth sink into my skin like two over-sized needles. It was throbbing as he sucked my blood. I could feel it, my own deep red blood leaving my body and into his throat and all I could do was be held by him, staying limp.

The real pain began once he'd pulled away. 'Save the best for last' was the final thing I heard him mutter to me before this world of hate and revulsion consumed me entirely. I could faintly feel the slight loss of touch then the sensation of a soft material underneath me. My death bed; how fitting.

I passed out after that. And I dreamed – astounding that I dreamed at all – about Ben, pain then finally; death. I could hear vividly Ben begging me to stay, to deny the trip to Italy. To stay in Port Angeles with him; and by now, it was all I wanted; my Benjamin.

I was positive I was dying, because in my reverie, I died horrifically. It was beyond my own belief that I happened to have a vivid dream while I was in such dreadful pain outside my slumber. I could remember the dream clearly, since it was so unbelievably real to me; like I was actually there, living it out. I remember that I was wearing a plain dirty grey dress, one that commoner women wore everyday in the 1600's. I listened enough in History to know what era it was.

The people surrounding me were shooting acidic glares at me, like I was the incarnate of evil. Why were they angry? I didn't do anything; I was a simple, nice girl who was never out of place. Why did they hate me? Why? I didn't understand.

It was then I realized that I was being hauled up onto a large overbearing stake that was in the middle of a pile of wood. They thought that I, kind and timid Angela, was a _witch_. I was the eldest daughter of the village's minister, why was I being wrongly accused for being a vile witch?

I was now strapped to the stake, the villagers retreating away from me like I had the plague. I was beginning to believe that I did. I knew for myself, that I wasn't an evil witch. Who had thought that? Who in the world began this entire thing? I gazed over the people with a composed look, even though my insides were twisting and turning in anxiety and pain; I was going to die here.

As I looked around, seemingly resigned to my fate, I spotted my father; my loving, dark haired, olive toned father. He was wearing a hate-filled glare, like everyone else. Why? I was asking myself that a lot. _Why?_

I don't know.

My eyes stayed locked on my father's as two commoners walked up with flames alight on their pieces of wood and chucked them below me, into the pile. The bark and debris sparked ablaze and my fate was sealed. My eyes never felt my father's eyes, identical to my own. I was faintly aware of my mother beside him; she was quivering. I was glad.

The flames grew higher and hotter, catching with my dress as it was brushed by the wind. It hurt and I cringed. The villagers smiled. What had this come to? I didn't want to know.

The bright heat was much taller now; it had climbed up my dress and was licking the olive skin on my stomach painfully. This was hell, kill me now.

It went higher, and higher until I could feel the red wisp flick angrily against my cheek, I was peeling away.

Death would come quick after this. I thought it was the case, it wasn't. Long after my charred body was pulled down and thrown to the dogs, the heat and pain hadn't stopped, because by then I was awake again, horrifying dream over with. Now I was burning and dying from the inside.

Even in my dreams, the pain was still at hand. The burning flames that licked at my already charred and blackened flesh were still present, and still evilly unrelenting. I had no escape, as I was paying for an unknown sin. 'What did I do?' I asked my conscience. I already had the answer; nothing. Because I was not the evil one, I was becoming one.

The pain was fierce; I could understand that one thing. It was also difficult to try and match the two physical pains. The pain in my dream was horrifying, a mixture of fear, anxiety and terror; a combination that could shake any person to their souls.

The pain I was currently experiencing was equally horrible. The flames were inside me; in my head, in my stomach, everywhere in my arms and legs. I could feel it all over, yet my body was intact. It made no logical sense, but my dream earlier didn't either.

I was lost; lost and confused. I had no idea how long this excruciating pain had been going on for. It felt like days, weeks, possibly months; the worst kind of torture, if I'd known any kinds before this experience. The only remote kind of happiness I felt – although it was extremely minimal – was the fact that I did not pass out again.

After the moments I could spare, I had realized that the pain in my dream was worse than the pain when I was awake. Because in my dream, I received both; he flames licking at my destroyed skin paired with the heat inferno inside my limbs was a practice that I would condemn, if I had the chance. No one should ever feel like this.

I still did not know why I felt like this.

My mind couldn't comprehend anything anymore, only the sounds of my agonized screams I let loose every once minute or so. How long was I here for? I asked again. Was there even anyone here with me? I doubted it. The _things_ in the room before looked evil and unkind, however kind the main 'vampire' man sounded, he too was not dependable. My conscience rejected him. _Untrustworthy_.

I had sunk into oblivion by the time the fire and heat began to slightly recede, all before the big finale. All before I died, it would seem.

I was stupid to gain slight hope as the fire dulled and began moving outwards to my fingertips, my toes. I had a slimmer of hope, all before the red hot pain shot back into my, straight to my heart causing it to beat faster that I had even felt it before.

The traces left of my mind were bitterly sarcastic. The fire wouldn't kill me, of course! Apparently, I would die of a flame-induced heart attack. Lovely.

I could feel every thump my heart made against my ribcage, almost threatening to shatter them completely. I was dying, I knew it. It felt like it. I was dying, I was going to die. It struck me, just as my heart gave its last thump before stopping completely.

Everything left my body in a sudden. No more fire, or heat, or pain. Just…nothing. I felt empty. This is what being dead felt like. I was dead.

Sadness washed over me, I wasn't alive anymore. I was never going to see my real father, my kind and loving father, with my lovely justified mother. My brother Isaac and Joshua, I'll never see them grow up…I'll never be an aunt.

Ben. My Benjamin. My boy; my loving Ben. He was lost to me. I was never going to see him again, ever. I was lost, he was lost.

There was still nothing. Oblivion; _my _oblivion.

"Dearest, wake up." A musical voice rang out, it sounded like it was directly in my ear. It hurt, yet I couldn't bring myself to make a sound. I was dead, the dead was silent. I was silent. "Really now. Angela, Dearest." The voice said again, something brushing against me. My hand? I wasn't sure. "I know you are awake." It was a male voice, it lured me in. Who was it? Ben? No…it wasn't my Ben. My Ben was alive, breathing without me. The thought would have made my heart stutter sadly against my chest, only it didn't. My heart wouldn't move at all. It never would.

The musical and masculine voice chuckled deeply. "Angela, Dearest, of course you're heart will not beat again. You are like me…like us."

It flooded back to me. It was the same man from the room, before all this pain and heat and death began. It was the vampire.

My eyes flew open, and I was blinded. Everything! Everything was in front of me! The sun, light and dark together, every slight contour of something, a black brick wall I think…

There was also the dust in the air, and the dirt on the only window the blinding sun was streaming through.

The sun…and glitter. I looked down at my own arm and it was alight with sparkles. My eyes widened in panic. I was dead pale, and I was glittering and shining just like a…disco ball? I heard a scream. It was piercing and high, who did it belong to?! I went to yell, when the scream stopped. It was me. My voice, like my skin, has changed and I was instantly reminded of the past.

It came to me like a silent movie, black and white with no voice or sound and through a mesh of cloth. It was like looking through an old movie reel. I was looking back at the infamous Cullen's and their snow white skin, all like. The same shade as mine.

Before I could say anything, the fire was back, searing. It was hot and painful against my throat with another feeling mixed in. I was parched.

The vampire chuckled again. "My Dearest girl." He said warmly. "I am Aro, and you are mine." He pronounced. My head whipped around to see him; I swear it was only a quarter of a second. He was old, I knew that at once. He had almost transparent like skin and bright red filmy eyes, and absolutely no imperfections.

"I do realize that this is all so new to you, Angela Dearest. But I believe that you can discover more about yourself later." He said clearly and I couldn't help but look at him strangely. "I know that you have other thoughts concerning yourself and some…hunger. That is why I prepared a meal."

I didn't have time to react before the door was burst open and a man was pushed through. I didn't see anything after that. I could only smell; smell and hear.

The delicious wet, pumping sound mixed with the more delicious smell I had ever had the pleasure of experiencing lured me up from my self-appointed 'death bed' before I was pulled towards the man, unknowingly. All I could comprehend that I was thirsting like I had never drank before; my throat burning me almost was bad as the dream had.

I had to get relief. My mouth closed around the man's throat, and I was satisfied.


	5. My Wrath

**My Wrath **

"_You seem to be thinking." Aro observed with awareness. "What's on your mind?" He asked and held out his hand._

_Marcus sat silently, almost acting as he'd never heard the other vampire. He stayed immobile, watching the small quick breaths that the motionless girl took, just like the predator he knew he was._

_Knowing he wasn't going to get an answer, – he usually never did unless in the company of others – Aro placed his ice cold palm against Marcus's shoulder. "So that's why." He mumbled as visions flew through his head. Sudden protectiveness overcame the Volturi leader as he slowly took his hand away. "Why does this child remind you of our dearest Didyme?" Aro questioned curiously._

_Marcus didn't speak as he contemplated his answer. "I am not sure." His deep voice was clear as a moonlit night. _

_Aro sighed with what only he knew was fake sympathy. "You cannot hold onto the past forever, old friend." He informed the stoic vampire, slight sympathy lacing his tone._

_Marcus sighed, realizing this was the first emotion he'd felt in a very long time. "Leave me be, Aro." He murmured, his eyes never leaving the lifeless girl on the silk covered bed._

_Aro scowled; too close. __**His**__, not Marcus's. His._

_Aro spun around on his heels and granted his brother's wish, seething in anger. But of course, he was a generous man like that._

*

My heart should have been beating horrifically against my chest, going a mile a minute. It should be hammering against my ribs as I struggled to capture a breath. But it wasn't, my now dead and lifeless heart was completely and utterly silent. My mind ran a mile a minute.

My own body was mentally refusing to open its eyes and witness the debris left over from my actions. I had killed someone, sucked them dry until I couldn't get a single drop of blood from their entire body. And – as I thought with disgust and horror – I _liked_ it.

I felt my body quivering, as I shook with self-repulsed tremors. What had I done? I had killed someone! I was filthy, I shouldn't be able to continue existing – I wasn't even alive anymore. I was a monster.

I remember vividly the thoughts running through my mind as I stood there. In my jumbled ideas and feelings I briefly considered why I wasn't tired. I had been standing here for the best of what 3, 4 hours? Yet I felt like I could keep going, like I was never going to wear out and collapse into infinity where my feelings weren't going to haunt me. This led me back to the fact that I had murdered someone, and I sunk further into the abyss.

Finally, when my eyes finally allowed me to open them, I wasn't quite sure what to think. I had expected to see blood everywhere; the walls, the floor, covering my body and clothes. I was positive to meet eyes with the man I'd killed, his human eyes staring deeply into my own eyes; the eyes of his murderer. Instead, I found myself face to face with an image of a person, a gorgeous and beautiful person, at that.

Her hair was long and lovely, coloured a rich light brown colour with bright golden strands twisting and twining all the way through giving it a colour made up of a million colours; it had a silky sheen to it, like fabric woven by an angel. The face was faultless, with sharp edges and curves, like a super model with plastic surgery, yet I could tell this was natural; a goddess's face.

Pouting pink lips, a small elegant nose and high cheek bones adorned the canvas.

Her skin was like porcelain that only little china dolls had; white and flawless with the tiniest pink blush on her cheeks, like she had just finished running.

My eyes then trailed upwards, meeting two dark smudges under the eyes. Dark purple, like she hadn't slept in a quite a while. Her eyes were almond shaped, and dangerous looking. My own eyes then hit bright pulsing red.

I jumped back in fright, the image doing the same. I felt my face contort in confusion, the images copied me. A screeching sound echoed through the room. I quickly covered up my ears, the sound piercing into my eardrums painfully. The noise stopped suddenly – to my relief – to reveal a pair of female voices talking like the painful screaming never happened.

"Damnit Renata, you just had to stick a mirror right over her face before she woke up." The first voice mumbled, light and airy, but clearly irritated.

"Don't blame me." A more husky feminine voice chided back. "It was Aro's orders. He thought that maybe if she saw how much more beautiful she was, she might not make a huge fuss like she is now."

The first voice scoffed. "Well obviously not."

I turned towards the women in a flash, scaring me when it happened in less than a second.

"Where am I?!" I yelled in panic, which sounded much like the screeching before. I didn't stop panicking to hear if they answered me.

My breathing was ragged as I took in deep gulps of air, thinking it would calm me. Surprisingly, it didn't. My eyes widened and I clawed at my chest, intense pain ripping through me as my fingernails slashed through the skin.

Immediately, two pairs of rock hard hands gripped my arms in vice holds.

"Stop now!" The girl's husky voice ordered as I felt myself pulling free of their grasp. Whipping around, I faced them for the first time; catching a glimpse of black and blonde, and spun around to the door to make a run for it.

I didn't understand how I was here. I obviously wasn't alive, but I was still _here; _unless I was in heaven. Angels live in heaven, angels like I've seen before...Yet with the intense pain of the reality and my dream – nightmare, I corrected myself. It was so much that I assumed that since my last thought, my last human feeling was of regret and pain then, I'd be in hell. But I was here now, existing but trapped. What was going to happen? Nothing good, I told myself; nothing good if I didn't escape to the door.

Just as I went to open the door – more like rip the stupid thing off its rusted, old hinges – it opened in a swift jerk, causing my hand to go through the wooden door easily.

I didn't register anything as footsteps echoed around the room, silence falling. I was still gaping astounded down at my hand, which was still impaled through where the handle should be.

"So sorry, Little Jane." The light voice chided. "We couldn't control her. She's a feisty one."

I spun around, immediately – bringing a chunk of the wall with me as well. "Jane?!" I screeched, and I realized that the hellish sound earlier was me. How? I was mind-numbing, and had my voice always been that high and loud? "What's happening?!"

I looked at her fiercely, rage seeping through my actions. I was crouching, with a snarl on my face. What was I? W-Was I a…

Jane looked at me with piercing, lifeless blood-red eyes. "Calm down." She said boldly and that's when the pain began.

I fell to the ground instantly, my mind fogged over from the intensity of the sudden attack on my head, life a sudden super-migraine. I fell to the ground writhing in agony. Was it stupid to say that I'd take my dream/nightmare-pain over this? This felt all too real, like my head was being frozen and melted at the same time.

I faintly heard the light feminine voice over my growls of agony. "Sure, aha." She said with a teasing tone. "You say 'calm down' so you hit her with a shot, that just great, Little Jane." She muttered sarcastically.

Jane hissed. "Be quiet, Chelsea. It was the only way; God knows that your power is useless in the situation."

The light voice – now called Chelsea – chuckled. "So what? My power doesn't work when the victim isn't relaxed enough; it's not that big of an obstacle."

I tried to heave myself up from the cold stone ground as Jane answered. I didn't hear, I exerted enough of my power pulling my body up as it was, so I didn't hear the end of their conversation.

"Jane." The husky voice from before muttered. "She's losing her comprehension."

I faintly heard Jane hissing, then suddenly, the pain lifted from my mind and I was left lying on the ground, recovering.

Almost soft hands picked me up from the ground gingerly and set me on the bed. After a moment, I opened my eyes and was greeted by three of the most beautiful women I'd ever seen.

The differences between the three of them were astounding, yet they were amazingly the similar.

The first, a stunning and leggy blonde a slightly conventional facial structure smiled at me. "My name is Chelsea." She introduced her voice light and feminine and pointed to the shorter, olive toned girl. "And this is Renata. You know Jane already."

As I looked over Renata, I noticed she was different than Chelsea with her face, which was stockier and fuller where Chelsea was thinner.

Lastly was Jane – who I could tell apart, even without Chelsea's introduction. She was pretty, with almost childish features. Her delicate, small features didn't look right scrunched up into a grimace.

As I looked them over with new eyes, I felt my mind wander. They were different, beautiful and exotic. Like the image of the woman when I first opened my eyes. The images of me, I told myself. I knew all along that it was me, in my subconscious. My face was evened out, my hair gorgeous and irresistible, and my terrifying, bloody red pulsing eyes. This was the new me. I was...I was a...

I bit my lip and closed my eyes, speaking for the first time. "Monsters." My own new, high voice resonated like a harps but held a painful sting to it. "What am I?" I whispered pointlessly and collapsed to the bed, waiting for the tears to come. Somehow, I wasn't surprised when only dry sobs came through.


	6. My Past

**My Past**

"_How dare she?!" Jane's voice screeched followed by the loud crash of the vase that hit the wall. "I brought her here to __**protect**__ Master Aro! That's all! But now, she's all he can think about!" This time, a painting – most likely of the priceless and ancient kind – smashed to pieces and fell to the ground. _

_Alec looked upon his furious sister with what can only be described as a blank expression. "Jane."His voice was as emotionless and bland as his face muscles as he spoke. "Calm down." _

_Jane spun violently to him, fast enough to make a human dizzy. "What?!" She shrieked at him and flung the next expensive object at him. A second later, the platonic twin was standing next to her watching as the antique terracotta pot crumbled. "Calm down, Jane or I will force you." He warned and she felt the beginnings of lethargy creep up on her. _

_Jane hissed and shot him a warning look that said it all. She could use her power, too. _

"_Don't get yourself worked up over a baby, Jane." Alec murmured to his sister in the most loving way he could. "You're not going to lose your place on Aro's lap, be sure of that." He said mockingly – with the most emotion yet – and stalked out of the room, leaving Jane worse off than before. _

*

The emotional pain didn't lessen as the day continued. The physical pain was practically just a dream to me now, but I couldn't escape my conscience. It was as if that poor, unfortunate man I sunk my new teeth into was following me everywhere, staring at me. Now I feel like I'm in some cheesy teen horror movie, of the likes that I thought I'd left behind in my Forks High days. I guess not, because, apparently I'm a vampire. Sorry if I'm not exactly believing it, my mind has accepted this strange, twisted information but my body is rejecting the entire suggestion altogether.

"Dearest? Are you alright?" A voice asked and broke through my reverie causing my head snapped up to the voice, it only took a millisecond, too. I was starting to scare myself. The speaker, Aro, smiled warmly at me, although all I could feel was terror.

"You drifted off there." He noted with a teasing expression. I nodded slowly, I was trying to escape to this fantasy in my mind but it wasn't working. This new, monster version of the old, lost Angela was extra sensitive to noise and sight. I could see everything like this, and the only way to get away from it was if I closed my eyes. If I did that, I could hear everything like wearing some sort of three-times the strength stethoscope.

"Sorry." I murmured to him, also not used to the voice. Aro smiled down at me and I knew I would have shivered if I were not now made from stone.

"It's quite alright, Angel." He said affectionately and patted my head like I was some dog. "There is no reason to be afraid of this. It's all a wonderful, amazing gift!" He exclaimed, his hand leaving my hair to be shot into the air into an extravagant shout.

I stayed quiet. It was unnerving, that talent of his. Of what most things the vampires around here can do.

I was told everything after my little break-down that was just yesterday. Apparently as I was sprawled out on the ground, dry heaving, Renata had run off to get Aro to explain things calmly to me. He in turn, brought along the person who scared me the most so far. Alec.

_I was briefly aware of Aro strolling care freely into the room, hands behind his back with such a serene expression on his face I was amazed he was the blood-lusting monster I'd just found out he was moments beforehand. His smile widened instantly as soon as his eyes locked on me. "Dearest!" He shouted and walked over to me, not kneeling or crouching to get down to my level on the ground, either. He just stood there, watching me from high-up with a pleasant smile. _

_I was too caught up with watching Aro to notice the other figure in the room that'd walked in just behind him. Granted, he was small and quiet enough to not get noticed anywhere. When I did tear my eyes away from Aro's mocking smile, I noticed he was standing next to a smug-looking Jane. _

_Aro turned his head to look at the new person and nodded. "Go on, Alec." And then I was gone. There was just, nothing, like I wasn't even consciously there anymore. I was a corpse that had no purpose or reason. I couldn't even hate it, even if I knew I did, I didn't. I felt confused, but I wasn't. I was just...nothing. _

_It was then I hated Alec, even if I couldn't feel it at that point. But I still hated him. Because he causing complete and utter nothingness, something I would die to stop. _

"_Just hearing and touch, please." Aro commanded the stoic boy who nodded in response. _

_I could then recognise myself being picked up from the cold, stone ground and being set on the bed by strong arms; the feeling of touch. "Now, Dearest." A voice close to me said. Hearing as well now, but I still couldn't see, talk, smell or move at all. It was better than nothing, but now I felt weaker and more vulnerable. "Let me explain properly. It does seem my girls were a bit forward with the explaining with the mirror and everything, and I apologize profusely for that. They really didn't mean it." Aro said in earnest. "I should have known that you weren't a girl to care about your looks. You are much fonder of your intelligence, aren't you?" He said rhetorically; he knew I couldn't answer in this position. I once again felt nothingness hate for the small, black haired boy in the corner. Alec, I though the name acidly. _

_Aro brushed his cold hand against my forehead and pushed the hair away before chuckling. "Now that's not a nice thing to think. Alec is a very nice person once you get to know him, aren't you, Alec?" He asked. Rhetorical again, I assumed since I didn't hear a voice from the other side of the room. _

_I then touched the subject I didn't want to. Could vampires read minds? _

_I could almost hear Aro smirking in confidence. "No, Dearest. Only very few of us have the ability to read minds, let alone have a power at all. Don't worry so much." He teased and I felt myself relax. It was one less thing to worry about. _

_The vampire above me brushed his hand across my limp, useless arm, over and over. It was a disturbing habit he seemed to have; touching people. _

"_I can't read minds unless I touch people, Angel." He said and practically giggled at himself. "Sweet, isn't it? Like Angela but with no 'a'." He giggled again at his own little joke that I didn't at all find funny. At least he didn't call me Ange. Ben called me Ange._

_Aro stopped brushing my arm and giggling and I felt a stab of instant terror run through my veins. _

"_Ben?" Aro voiced. "I wonder who he is..." He murmured to himself and then seemed to be in deep concentration. "Ah, the high school sweet heart, very cute. You two were pretty serious, too..." He said and went back into focus. _

_He was like this for a while, and I could honestly say I had no idea why. _

"_The..." He whispered before stopping abruptly and pulling his hand from my arm. I couldn't see anything, so we all sat in silence for a while until a heard a low growl coming from what I assumed to be Aro. "Them." He whispered and the sound of something cracking hit my ears. The only idea I could think of was that Aro had punched the grey, stone wall. I knew myself how strong vampires were, I'd just ripped a door handle from the door half an hour earlier like it was a leaf from a branch. _

_Aro cleared his throat briefly before I felt his hand on my arm once again. "Release her, Alec. She seems quite fine and relaxed now." _

_My sense of vision and proper coherency slowly came back to me, although I sat there a while longer, just to avoid opening my eyes and seeing them. _

_Aro chuckled – his light mood seemingly back in a few minutes – and pet my head. "Come now, Angel. There's no need to keep us waiting." _

_Fine, I thought irritably. I won't. I attempted to make my eyes open quickly, possibly a little childish idea of scaring him when all it did was effectively blind me for a second or two. _

"_Ah!" I screeched and my hands flew to my eyes. The light was so bright it had actually rendered me incapable of seeing anything but white. _

_Aro clicked his tongue as I sat there hold my eyes to keep the mid-light – at best – out. "It seems she was in that state for a tad too long; better keep note of that, Alec."_

_It took me a while to slowly get up again, this time I'm actually proud to say it didn't happen in a few milliseconds. _

_I looked around tentatively once the light didn't hurt my eyes anymore. The girls Chelsea, Renata and Jane had all left at some point, probably earlier on, and all that were left was Aro and Alec. _

_Aro hovered over my form on the bed with a smile. "It appears you are calm enough to precede, Angel. So, shall we?" _

Aro then explained – in great detail – what vampires were, and – apparently even more importantly –, who the group of renown vampires called the Volturi was and how lucky I was to be one of them.

I couldn't appreciate it, though. I'd thought about it, and I knew I didn't want to be a vampire. It was hell already, and I could never, ever escape it.

I could feel Aro's hand lightly brush my head, just like a dog.

And all I could think of was nothing.

_This chapter is dedicated to the ANZAC's. God bless. _


	7. My Dilemma

**My Dilemma **

_Sunlight filtered through the clear, open window into the occupied room. A soft, feminine hum came from the bed as sudden glitter enveloped the room making the glass panes light up beautifully. _

"_Are ready to face the family, love?" A smooth, honeyed male voice asked and another hum came from the bed in reply. _

"_Not yet...I'd much rather stay here, with you." The woman crooned at him. "Everyone will try and take you away from me." He simply nodded and smiled before joining her on the large bed. _

_After a few moments, he leant down and kissed her forehead before kissing along her jaw. "Penny for your thoughts, love?" He asked humorously. _

_The woman chuckled. "I'm thinking about Forks." She confessed; a sad undertone to her voice. "I miss everyone, Charlie, Renee, the Pack, Angela..." She sighed and buried her face into his neck. "Sorry." _

_He shook his head. "No, I miss Forks as well. Portland just doesn't have the same feel." _

_The woman looked up at him happily. "So...we can go? Just as a check up! Not to expose ourselves or anything." _

_The man nodded. "We'll have to take it up with the rest of the family, but if they're fine with it, of course. If they're not, we'll just go alone." He said, stroking her cheek. _

_She smiled brightly. "Thank you, honey. Hey! Maybe Jake and Renesmee could come too...I know Jacob's dying to see Seth again. Oh! And Charlie!" She gushed. _

_He smiled at her amusedly and played with a lock of her hair. "You've wanted this for a while, haven't you?" _

_Isabella Cullen smiled at him sweetly. "Yeah," she said to her husband. "I have, Edward. I really miss it..." _

*

Sleep was one of the things people ultimately take for granted. I'd never wanted to fall into unconsciousness so much as I did now. It circled all my thoughts, and I found out that having one thing in my mind was difficult enough; along with this new life I'd been painstakingly given. I hated it, every second was bad enough, but Aro undoubtedly made it 10 times worse.

I wasn't even sure anymore. I wasn't aware how long I'd been here, until I'd asked Chelsea. She said it was around six days after 'the transformation' – as she'd put it.

The idea shot through me like electricity. It has only been six days since the horror began, and it had felt like months.

Aro kept me at his side at all times, like his little lap dog with no freedom. I truly despised him for what he's done to me. It's like I can't even feel things anymore, things I used to take for granted – just like the aforementioned sleep. Now I can barely even touch the bricks of my room without having to restrain myself. However most of the time they just crumble in my new hands, although this is usually when I'm distracted by dust or something. This happens quite alot, unfortunately. I used to think of myself as someone who was very attentive, and sharp-minded. Now a simple thing like individual dust motes distracts me.

I cringed in distaste as Aro stroked my caramel hair with fake tenderness. "We have a big day ahead, Angel." He murmured to me quietly, as if it were for my ears only. But I knew better now; every single other vampire in the room could hear him also. Jane growled lowly, but Aro took no notice. "Heidi comes back today."

I turned my head minimally towards him. "Heidi?" I questioned before wincing, my voice was so completely foreign to me now...

Aro nodded absentmindedly, his gaze on the stone door. The same door I was brought through get over a week ago. "She is our...fisher." He said wryly.

I turned to him fully, now I could see Renata standing on the other side of him. My look was questionable. Fisher? That made absolutely no sense... I knew for a fact that vampires had no desire for food. No one actually told me this fact, but I put the pieces together on the day five. I hadn't wanted any food or water in the past week, but only an intense, raging need for the red liquid I'd come to hate.

So really, I didn't understand Aro's quizzical statement.

"Excuse me, Aro?" I asked him.

Renata took one look at Aro and took it upon herself to answer for him. He was still intently looking at the door.

"Heidi...captures humans, tourists in Volterra. She brings them back here for us." She said, attempting to keep the emotion from her voice.

My eyes widened. "Fishing..." I murmured, dispassionately. "What's the bait, then?" I asked sarcastically. I didn't expect an answer; I got one anyway.

"She can conjure up your greatest desire." Chelsea cut in from the other side of the room. "Actually, her body is usually man's true desire. Truth be told, any one of us women here could do her job, but she still acts like she's the fucking queen of this castle." She hissed out.

Aro broke his gaze of the door and looked exasperatedly at her. "Must you, Chelsea dear?" He asked. "If it were not for Heidi, we'd all be going hungry tonight. Apparently, she worked pretty hard on this catch." I winced once more at the fishing reference. My father used to fish... all wholesome qualities of the activity had exited my buzzing mind.

I nodded slightly to her, and turned back to the door. Steps could be heard coming down the stone stairwell. I could hear about thirty heavy, ungraceful ones and only one light, lithe footstep. 'Heidi' was here.

Aro grinned largely as the stone door was easily pushed aside by the vampire woman, Heidi. Tall and very curvy with long, straight mahogany hair and a strange colour of violet for her eyes – contacts, I realized as I practically saw the venom sizzling through them – was all Heidi. Following her were a large group of tourists.

I also noticed with a disgusted look, that there was a small child with them. A little girl, with strawberry blonde pigtails looking very bored as she tugged on her mother's summer dress. I would have been sick if the only thing I'd ingested in the last week wasn't blood.

"Welcome!" Aro greeted warmly. "I formally welcome you to Volterra!" He exclaimed before his shot out like a dart from in between Renata and I. Every other member of the Volturi seemed to take this as an 'ok' and went in for it too.

I looked at Renata quickly, only to see her shoot me an apologetic look before joining her fellow vampires.

I resisted. I knew I did, I think... so many members of the Volturi had already sunk their teeth into the fish and began feeding. Sweet, delicious blood swelled my senses and I unconsciously felt myself being thrust into the fray by my own legs.

And as I sunk my teeth into a gasping man, I realized that I would have lunged straight at that little girl with the pigtails if Jane hadn't gotten there first.

*

"What about this shade?" Chelsea asked Renata attentively. The timid girl nodded mutely before Chelsea turned on me. "What about you, Angela?"

I looked at the shocking shade of red and shuddered. "Try blue." I said wryly and took out a deep blue colour from the box. I'd had too much of red, I had to see it every day in the mirror anyway.

Chelsea frowned at me. "But then it'd be like the American flag, y'know?" She said and pointed to her eyes, then her skin and finally the bottle.

"Very funny. Red, white and blue." I said with a smirk. "I'd comment on how patriotic you were if we weren't in Italy permanently."

The alliances you gain while in confinement are amazing. Especially considering that it was Chelsea and Renata that were the only decent ones in the entire castle. Thank god they were the ones that clung to me my first few days here.

It'd only been a day since the incident in the throne room. Every time I closed my eyes I could see that little girl's fearful expression as Aro's one brother – Caius, I think. They usually keep away from me regardless – grabbed onto her mother. The sunny summer dress stained with blood and her daughter's pretty pink one followed closely behind.

I tried to be as clean as possible with the man I was drinking from.

Renata brought me back from my horrific musings with a nudge. "Hey, Angela?" She asked me, concern in her voice.

"Hm?" I asked her dazedly. "Oh, I'm fine." I smiled at her, although she didn't appear to be convinced.

"You've been really spacey." Chelsea commented, not looking up from her magazine. Yes, I was very shocked when they brought the latest Cosmo into my room. "Are you okay? Settling in alright?"

I hummed lightly. "Hm, yes." I murmured. "I'm fine. Just...confused, I guess."

Renata looked up worriedly while Chelsea barely shifted her eyes away from 'How to Deliver the Best Kiss'. "Was there something wrong with your meal yesterday?" She questioned instantly.

I cringed and shook my head. "That's probably the worst thing. There wasn't anything wrong with it; honesty, I've never felt a more enjoyable rush than when I... feed."

Chelsea sat up now, and looked at me with raised eyebrows. "So...?" She spurred on. Renata coughed, although it was unneeded.

"She's feeling guilty." She whispered. The blonde vampire scoffed. "Why? Humans are food, that's all."

I smiled sadly and looked down at my hands as Renata continued. "You were changed so long ago, Chelsea. It's easy to forget the feelings once you've been like this for as long as you have." She whispered. Chelsea shook her head and muttered before turning back to her magazine.

I smiled thankfully at Renata just as the sound of light but determined footsteps came towards our door. Chelsea's eyes snapped up quickly and Renata tensed. "Who is it?" I whispered.

They didn't answer for a while, not until Chelsea nodded tersely. "I told him not today." She hissed out and appeared to focus intently on her magazine; although I could tell her mind wasn't in it now.

Renata sighed and leant back. "Demetri." She greeted as the door swung open. Standing there was a man I recognized from the throne room.

He was lean and tall, with dark hair the brushed his shoulders. Not to mention the usual bloody red eyes. He smiled at the other two girls politely, and I could see Chelsea visibly stiffen and turn away. Renata offered an apologetic smile.

"Not to disturb your little party, girls. But I must have a quick word with Angela." He said, his voice not straying too far from a phone sex operator's. It took me a few seconds to understand.

"Oh!" I mumbled and stood up when Renata gave me an encouraging nod. I smiled at them.

"She'll be back soon, so don't fret." He smiled humorously and placed a hand on the small of my back as we walked from the room.

I knew for a fact that the Volturi Castle was very large and very gorgeous; but also extremely cold and terrifying. And being with Demetri only seemed to make that worse.

We eventually came to a stop in an indoor garden. That amazed me, since there was hardly any light filtering in from any window. There _were_ no windows in Volturi Castle.

Demetri then turned to look at me and crossed his lean arms over his chest. "Now, Angela. I'm not one to beat around the bush, and I know that people have been worried about you." He said and my eyes widened.

"W-What?" I stuttered as he narrowed his eyes and leered down at me.

"I just want you to know, little Angela, that if you try to escape _I will hunt you down and destroy you_." He said in the most frightening voice I had heard since I'd become a vampire.

It didn't even occur to me that he might not be able to. The resolution in his voice was so strong, I felt like even if I didn't believe it, he'd come after me.

I nodded silently and wrapped my arms around myself as Demetri nodded with grim satisfaction before silently exiting the room.

I didn't leave the room until hours later. Renata and Chelsea were still there, waiting.


	8. My Sting

**My Sting**

"_Yes, Master Aro?" Demetri's deep, baritone voice asked aloud. "What do you need me for this time?" _

_Aro chuckled. "Don't sound so down, my son. I am not asking you to do what I asked last time, I see now that was far too harsh." He said and brushed a hand across the younger vampire's hand. Demetri flinched minimally before stepping away breathed a sigh of relief. _

"_Thank you, Master." He murmured. _

"_Now, back to business. Our dearest brethren __Eleazar is supposed to update us at least every six months about the, ah, Cullen situation." He explained carefully. "He hasn't given any word as of yet, and he is already three months late." _

_Demetri nodded carefully. "You think he might have done a runner?" He asked. _

_Aro smiled and shook his head. "I never said that, Demetri. I merely stated a fact." _

_The man scoffed. "I'm sure, really. But you never just 'state a fact', Master Aro. You always want something, because if you didn't want everything there wouldn't be a Volturi Guard." _

_Aro chuckled. "Inquisitive as always, son." His eyes narrowed dangerously, but his smile stayed in place. "Yes, check it out for me." _

_Demetri nodded. "Solo?" _

"_No, take...Angela with you. She needs to be taught her loyalties." _

*

Horrible, agonizing months had passed; six, to be more precise. Six terrifying months have passed in Volterra, and I was no closers to fitting with the other vampires.

Sure, Chelsea had tried her hardest to make me feel better, to help me understand the way of life that had been thrust upon us. No one chose this life, I had found out. No one in the Guard, although possibly Aro, Caius and Marcus had, I wasn't completely sure. I stayed away from the throne room whenever possible. But the rest of the Guard, I had found out, never wanted to be vampires. Not even Jane, or her horrible brother Alec. They were just about to be burnt at the stake for displaying...unusual abilities when some members of the Guard came and 'saved' them. This is all from Chelsea, Volterra's self declared gossip, but I trusted her enough.

Renata didn't try to help, though. She said there was no point, because the feeling would never go away; the terrible sensation of helplessness, pain and the unbearable thoughts that, no matter what, plagued your mind constantly.

Loved ones, were they happy? Have they moved on? Were you nothing but a simple memory now that you were gone, never to return?

Renata was lost, I realized. She hated what she was, possibly even more so than I do. In the long run, maybe I will come to accept what I am. I missed my mother and my father, the twins and most of all, my dearest Ben. But what Renata had went deeper than that, I could tell. I didn't know what she went through in her human life, but it had more impact on her than my whole entire life did for me.

However, no matter how little my loss was to hers, it didn't lessen the fear that clenched my cold, unbeating heart as I imagined Ben; my sweet, adorable Ben, who I would never see again, who I loved so much. I had planned my entire life out with him, centring round only him. I would be a good wife, who did the housework, and helped out with the bills. I wouldn't have just sat back as he made all the money, I was a strong woman, and I could support us also. But I didn't want to do that, though, not without Ben. He was my drive, and now I was damned to vampirism, an eternity of nothing. No Ben.

"Hey, Ange." Chelsea said and snapped her long, manicure fingers under my nose. "You're not still mulling, are you?"

I rolled her crimson eyes, not answering. Chelsea had told me that she didn't _want _to be a vampire, but now that she was, there was no point in sulk over it. In her words, at least.

She didn't understand the pain I felt, if anyone did, it was Renata. Although the olive toned girl seemed worse off than I.

The statuesque vampire sighed depleted. "Really girl, you need to get out of this slump. It looks like your getting castle fever."

I shot a quick look at her. _Castle Fever?_

"I mean, like Cabin Fever, you need to get out of here and see the world with your new eyes." She chuckled. "Ask Aro, you've been a good girl. I'm sure he'll let you off the leash for a while."

"That sounds like I'm a dog." I growled at her.

She shrugged her shoulders. "Might as well be; we're all under Aro's beck and call anyway."

I sighed and rolled over on the bed as Chelsea went back to her magazine. I still hadn't found out where she got all of them.

Just then, a quick knock rattled my door.

"Oh great." I muttered and got up to unlock it, and to my surprise, it was Demetri standing on the other side. I bit my lip quickly; the intimidating tracker hadn't bothered me since our 'chat' six months ago. "Demetri?" I asked shakily.

He smirked and nodded once to Chelsea, who was glaring at him with flying daggers. He didn't seem to notice. "Angela." He began and turned back to me, all smug looks gone. "We have a mission."

Chelsea gasped. "Mission? To where?" Her voice was turning shrill. I didn't pay much attention.

"Mission?" I asked quietly. Demetri seemed to dismiss the blonde vampire and answered me instead.

"Yes, a mission to Alaska. We are to leave immediately." He said and cocked his head in the opposite direction of my room. I nodded, in a state of shock.

_Alaska!_ Oh, how close that was to Washington. Well, not really. But when you compared the distance to Italy, it seemed like just a stone's throw away. "Alaska." I breathed out as I pulled on my boots.

"Let's go." Demetri said and guided me out. I swung around and waved to Chelsea's shocked face before the door shut, and we both sped off.

*

My mind wouldn't let me believe how close I was as we ran through the crisp surroundings. Ice and snow was everywhere, and I was sure that if I wasn't so...dead at the moment, I would have died. It looked so cold, so unreal and white and deadly. Beautiful, none the less but it didn't stop me from cringing as me ran past a completely frozen lake. If someone would fall in, if the ice cracked and a human fell through, they'd die quite quickly.

I bit back a thought as Demetri looked back at me. We'd been running in silence constantly for a day now, but no tiredness seeped into my bones. I didn't think it would.

"Um, Demetri?" I asked quietly, I knew he heard me though. He nodded minutely, not looking back. "Why are we in Alaska?"

Demetri scoffed. "About time you asked, I figure maybe I brought a doll along with me." He commented. "A source of Aro's is supposed to send word every six months, but there hasn't been anything from him in a couple of months. Master Aro was concerned, so he sent us."

I furrowed my brow. "Why me, though?"

He smirked. "How should I know?"

I frowned and looked the other way. "It's rude to answer a question with a question." I muttered as he laughed outright.

"It's also rude to talk back to someone of higher rank than you." He retorted back. I kept my mouth shut for the rest of the run.

After a few more hours or so, we came across a small set of houses in the middle of nowhere, the only life the many pine trees surrounding the area. I pushed my eyebrows together as Demetri slowed to a stop a hundred meters from the houses.

"Why have we stopped?" I questioned.

"Because if we go any closer, they might see us as enemies and attack us. We don't want that, do we?"

I bit my lip; it seemed Demetri's patience was wearing thin with me. I didn't understand, though. We'd barely exchanged words the whole way. "But if this vampire is acquaintances with Aro, shouldn't we be okay with them, too?"

Demetri heaved a big sigh. "Possibly, but I don't exactly want to take any risks."

I nodded absently as the door of the biggest log house opened, a gorgeous blonde woman stalking out, followed by another blonde woman and a man with long brown hair.

"Hello." She greeted curtly as she came to a stop ten meters from us. "What does the Volturi want from us?" Along with beautiful, she seemed to be frank too.

Demetri smirked. "We can't just come and check up?" He asked teasingly, and I could see the front woman tense. "No, really." Demetri continued. "Aro was wondering where Eleazar was. We haven't heard any word from him in quite a while."

Blonde woman recoiled. "Eleazar and Carmen have been down in Seattle for the past few months. Checking up on things there, after the recent Newborn attacks there, we have been extremely careful. Especially after the Cullen's left the area."

My head snapped up, and all eyes seemed to fall on me, along with Demetri's confused one. My unneeded breathe caught in my throat.

Cullen's? As in, Edward, Alice, and the new Isabella Cullen? How do these vampires's know about my high school friends?

The blonde woman raised her eyebrow. "Anyway..." She began, tearing her gaze away from my started form. "That's why he hasn't sent any word. He didn't have the chance to. It appears some of your lackeys completely forgot to eradicate some of the newborns. They're still running wild down there, and Eleazar and Carmen went down to help."

Demetri ran a hand through his hair, cursing as he did so. "Damned Jane." He said clearly.

The blonde vampire sighed. "Well, that's where they are now, so you can just head back off to Volterra." She said, almost sneered and waved her hand. The other two behind her hadn't moved and talked the entire time, just stood glaring at us. Everyone hated the Volturi, didn't they?

Demetri shook his head. "No can do. Master Aro would want us to go down there and help out as much as we could. Exterminate all the Newborns for the sake of peace."

The woman shook her head almost frantically. "No, no. It isn't just Eleazar down there with Carmen, they have some visitors too. They're helping with the problem while they're in the area."

Demetri's eyes narrowed. "Who are they?"

The woman sighed tiredly and ran one elegant hand down the side of her face. "If you must know, it's two Cullen's. Edward and Bella."

*

A/N:

Oh yes, I updated early. I know, big shocker. My internet access is extremely limited at the moment, however, so I've been spending most of my time getting to know the keyboard, and my old gameboy better.

Anyway, yes! Huzzah! We're finally getting there in the plot and as a thank you for sticking with me for so long – in times of hardship as I procrastinate to the max – the next chapter will have Ben in it!


	9. My Antagonism

**My Antagonism **

"_You know, Edward, this really sucks." Isabella Cullen commented dryly as another newborn charged at her, strength his only weapon against her knowledge. _

_Edward cast a panicked look at her; he hated it whenever she had to fight. "I know, love. But Eleazar and Carmen just are not enough to handle this many numbers." _

_Bella huffed. "But really! We were only gone a few months, who created all these newborns? I thought the Volturi dealt with all of them." She commented as a limb was strategically ripped from bone. She winced slightly but didn't pause in her fight. _

_Edward sighed. "They were supposed to; I assume Jane missed a few. Or they wanted more buddies. However, this could also be someone new entirely." _

_She took a quick look at him. "Another?" She asked, astounded. "Who else is there?" She sobbed without tears and looked around herself. Corpses all around, five of them, maybe six or seven even, now just a twitching mass. _

_Her husband wrapped an arm around her middle and brought her closer to him. "Love..." He sighed. "I don't want to rule out the possibility that it might be...Maria." _

"_Maria?! As in, Southern Maria? From Jasper's past?" She asked, panic in her voice. Why on Earth would Maria take the wars up North? _

_Edward nodded. "Yes. It is entirely possible, but well...we won't know until later, I suppose." He sighed once more before releasing her and pushing one hand into his slacks pocket, retrieving a packet of matches. "We need to take care of this, Bella." He said and grasped her hand tightly. _

_She nodded tersely. "Yes..." _

*

I didn't know what had snapped inside of me. One second I was standing behind Demetri in the middle of the trees, the Denali clan in front of us tensely and the next, my entire embodiment was pulsing, almost. I was thriving with new intent, happiness, and brand new wants and needs that I could fulfil. I felt energized, so much more so than I had been feeling in months. It was amazing, I was thriving on more energy than I had ever I think. I had never felt anything like it before...

I felt like my life had meaning now, not just a lifeless shell anymore. I had a purpose; I had to find Edward and Bella.

I fisted my cloak tightly in my hand; waiting for the tearing sound I was holding it so tightly. A feeling of helplessness suddenly washed over me. I realized, I had absolutely no way of escaping Demetri. He was faster, stronger and a helluva lot more experienced than me. I looked ahead of myself, gazing at the Denali clan who were frozen.

I spun to look at Demetri, who was looking at me with shock. I must have freaked out some. "Angela?" He asked with what I could mistake with concern. "What's the matter?"

I released my grip on the cloak. "Ah...um, I-I..." I stuttered. The blonde vampire looked at me with a strange expression, like she was thinking very hard. Recalling memories...

"Your eyes are black, Angela." Demetri said sternly. "I've noticed that you haven't been feeding as much as the rest of us in group feeding sessions."

I bit my lip hard enough to break the skin. "Uh..." I mumbled and gripped my cloak again. "Yes! I haven't been feeding well." I whispered to him.

Demetri nodded in understanding. "The first year is always difficult for newborns, I recall. Go off and feed quickly, I'll stay here and continue talking to the Denali clan."

I froze in shock. Well, that was easier than expected. "O-Okay. Um, should I find you?" I asked quietly, taking a quick look at the three other vampires and their gold eyes glaring at us. How did I not notice that before? They didn't have crimson eyes like the Volturi...was that something concerning the leaders of the clans?

Demetri grinned, terrifying teeth showing. "I'll find you." He said before giving me a brief push. I nodded and took off into the forest without another word. Maybe Demetri wasn't all bad...

*

The forest was think and dense, just like I remembered. I missed this place with all my body, and I was elated to be back, finally. How could I have not noticed how attached I was to Forks when I left it for college, and when I left to Italy all those months ago. I choked back a sob at that thought. Ben, my gorgeous, loving boyfriend I left behind without as much as a word for months. What did he think when I simply vanished into thin air? I didn't give any word at all about where I was and why I left without even a simple goodbye.

My dead heart clenched painfully. Did he still love me? I guess my leaving on an argument was the end of our relationship and I didn't bother stopping the cry that escaped my throat. No tears, though. Never any tears...

I managed to push my way through the trees into a small clearing, minus a few pieces of cloak. The think pines had managed to tear the grey material to pieces. It could also be because of the force I was pushing myself through the foliage. I wanted to get as far away from Demetri as I could before he realized what I was doing, where I was going...

But surely he would have noticed it by now, why I had gone so far south just for a quick feed. I squeezed my eyes shut as I stood in the middle of this meadow, just listening. I could hear nothing around me but deer and a mountain lion a few kilometres west. I sighed and took off towards Forks, my mind set on one thing; finding Bella and Edward.

I growled lightly to myself, I didn't want to see them first. Don't get me wrong, I do want to see them. It's been so long and I miss Bella so much, but my heart was moving steadily towards my Ben, and before I knew it I was racing off towards Port Angeles. My mind shut down, I was running on my sheer desire to see the man I loved.

Gazing up at the sky, I noticed it was dark out; maybe midnight. I picked up the pace with renewed force. Ben would be at home right now, most likely studying...

I pushing myself harder, I was only a blur through the trees by now.

I slowed by the time I reached the city, making my way hurriedly through the late night crowds. There were very little night clubs around Port Angeles, but they were pretty popular and attracted a wide arrange of people for the surrounding peninsula.

I managed to push the fog away from my mind long enough to noticed that I was getting some very strange looks concerning my dark grey cloak. I quickly ducked into an alleyway and disposed of it in a trash can before exiting quickly and making my way towards my former apartment.

The light was on; I noticed instantly and make my way into the entrance. The elevator couldn't go fast enough, I mumbled to myself angrily. I wasn't in a position to talk at the moment, though. I just ran from Alaska to Forks in a matter of hours. I never tested how fast I could run before. I let a brief surge of accomplishment run through me. My first chance to escape and I made it. The elevator dinged, and the doors opened with a clunk as I burst out of the confined area to my door, ripping it open in one swoop.

I didn't even have a last thought before I launched myself at Ben's surprised and joyous face and sunk my teeth into his neck.

The blood was amazing, thick and delicious as it ran down my throat in huge amounts. This was what I was denying myself in the throne room all those times, I only took enough to sustain myself. The person was usually dead by then, unfortunately. However they always resembled humans when I was finished, unlike Aro's or Caius's. Even Jane's; she manages to suck every single last drop of blood from her humans before they even hit the ground.

But now as Ben Cheney's blood ran down my throat, I felt as if I had never tasted anything better.

And that was what made me stop. That little thought that flew through my mind in one moment of ecstasy was what made me push myself away from Ben and spit out the blood in my mouth. He was lying there, limp and pale. Completely unconscious and I was the one who did it.

I sobbed and cried and punched the wall in anger and pain before rushing over to him. I pulled his head into my chest and rocked back and forth, crying like I never had before. No tears, never any tears...

I pressed my lips neck, right against the bite wound before gasping. A pulse, so faint and small I didn't even notice it before I did the one and only thing I could. I re-punctured his skin, and released my venom into his blood stream like I had done it a million times before.

Pulling back, I brushed a strand of pale hair from his forehead and kissed it lightly before gently placing him on the ground. I took one last look at my love, and ran out the door.

_What had I done? _

* * *

_**A/N:**__ Okay, I'm sorry. Yes, this chapter had practically no dialogue but it's essential for the plot. And, I live in Australia, so I really have no idea about where Alaska and Washington is geographically, please tell me so I can fix it! Thanks._

_Oh another note;_

**If you want to have your say in which person Angela ends up with, please vote in the poll on my profile.**


	10. My Monotony

**My Monotony**

_It wasn't quite fire to him, nor coal or burning flames. He was dying, subconsciously he knew that indefinitely. He was burning. There was no fire though, but you don't need flames to burn. Take nitro glycerine, or, in simpler terms, cold so freezing, it feels hot. _

_That was the thoughts going through Benjamin Cheney's mind as he went through hell. Burning – ice cold burning so sub-zero it was as if he was being frozen in time. He vaguely heard himself screaming in agony, but he payed it no mind. He was throbbing from every molecule in his body and that was all that occupied his mind. _

_He was slightly aware of a crash – the window, maybe? He didn't feel any glass shards hit him, but then again, the coldness seeping throughout his body froze him inside out and made him numb everywhere except for inside. _

_A soft murmur of voices resounded around his head – loud enough to be an annoyance but not loud enough to make them out. _

"_Ben?" A bell-like voice tinkled in his ears. "Shh..." It soothed, and he soon found himself slipping into monotonous misery. _

*

I never even thought that vampires could feel the cold, and I actually doubted that they could, but at that moment I'd never felt so icy.

Despite the warm, life-sustaining blood in my system – warming up my cheeks, making my face and body flushed rosy – I shivered in the arctic feeling.

It didn't matter that I'd had blood at that moment, of course it didn't. All that had flown out the window the second I'd sank my deadly fangs into _his_ neck. The same neck I'd kissed sweetly on numerous occasions; the same neck that used to flush tomato red when he caught me snapping a picture of him in mid-bite of his sandwich; the same neck that would never pulse with blood and life and _Ben_ ever again.

I looked around detachedly. I had no idea how I'd gotten here, to this abandoned factory. Machinery everywhere all dusty never to be used again, wires and electric boards and conveyor belts littered the place, but not a soul could be seen. I sat down silently and balled myself up, resting my head on my knees. My jeans I'd worn underneath my grey cloak were blood soaked. I spilled his blood.

I dry sobbed at the thought, but no tears came. "Ben," I whispered out brokenly. "Ben, Ben, Ben..."

"You do make such a pathetic sight, Angela." A remorseful voice commented. My neck snapped up to see Demetri gazing down at me, as though he was an all powerful God and I was just a lowly peasant. However, at that moment, it was everything I deserved.

"Demetri." I whispered, voice flowing smoothly – not cracking like it should have – like silk; I'd just fed, I was at the top of my game. I could take him if I needed to... I nearly smacked myself at the thought. _I deserve this_, I shouted at myself internally. _I killed him. _

"Such disgrace doesn't suit you, Angela. Get up and come – we need to get back to Italy. Aro's going to be very disappointed in you." He said with an air of aggravation, lament and penitence.

I winced at the thought before hauling myself to my feet and leaving the Reaper. He would take me away from here, away from my thoughts and feelings and regrets, and deliver me to the Devil. And I deserved it.

*

To save me from running off again – or causing a scene, really – Demetri flew us back to Italy, and if I wasn't internally killing myself over the incidents of earlier that day, I would have been extremely disappointed. I adored the run I experienced before, and exhilarating feeling of the air and the trees and the grass under my feet; everything my amazing, new and ready to be discovered. If only I had a better control of that atrocious internal beast inside me, I could be with Ben right now, and he would be living and loving me.

But then again, who would really love me now?

We had landed a few hours ago and drove to Volterra. No chances, Demetri had informed me and hired a _human_ driver. Often, I curse my guilt. If only I could just kill the man in the black and white suit who opened the door oh so politely for me. I looked like a wreck but he just smiled and nodded before saying 'ma'am' and shutting the limousine door behind me. I could not kill him as much as I could consciously kill Ben, and I never wanted to do that. It was the beast – I wondered briefly how long I could use that excuse. The first few years, but they had nearly passed, maybe I would be uncontrollable around humans forever?

I spent the entire car ride mulling over little things. What makes the pigments in the sky; why trains never seem to run on time; how dress makers make so many intricate designs... it was all pointless, however, they did their job and made me think about other things. Things like, not Ben or Demetri or _Aro_ – God forbid. But of course, all too quickly I found myself standing in front of him, as he sat on his stone throne like he was the God of all vampiric society.

"Angel, dearest." His tone was warm, and I was suspicious. "Why... Why... _Why?_" He continued and shook his head as if I was a disappointing child who brought home a cigarette or got an F on a huge test. Not that I tried to escape, or directly defied an order from a superior. I didn't want to pay attention to him, he was unnerving me. I looked down at a sparkling ring on his pink finger and saw my now deep, bright, _pulsing _red eyes looking back at me. They hadn't been that bright since...since I was changed.

I fought back revulsion before looking Aro in the eye once again.

"I am afraid I cannot let this little incident go unpunished," he informed me, continuing in the warm tone of a saddened parent. "However, I am a little merciful today. I shall let you pick, Jane or Alec?"

I looked to the side of the room at my choice of torture. Jane grinned maliciously and Alec stared back bored, like he didn't see nor did he care. I wanted that. I didn't want to think or care or feel for Benjamin Cheney.

"Alec," I whispered and I felt nothing. It was the best week of my life.

* * *

_**A/N:**__ Hey there, people. Now, I am so sorry for taking – honestly – forever to update. I just kind of...lost interest in vampires in general for a while. But I've started reading Interview with a Vampire and it's inspired me! So, sorry if my writing has changed; it does that when I change books and etc. _

_And just so everyone can picture him as I do, if you'd like, I think Ben looks like Ben McKenzie. It's probably the names, but I do think that that'd be what Ben Cheney would look like :)_


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